Home > Basketball, The Final Buzzer > The Final Buzzer : Mega Write Up Part 1- The East (8/4/11)

The Final Buzzer : Mega Write Up Part 1- The East (8/4/11)

The NBA Playoffs are coming. And I can’t wait! But until then, there are still teams fighting for playoff seedings, injury worries and the debates surrounding who should win the end of season awards. There are so much going out you just don’t want it to end! Kind of like Toy Story 3. So let’s jump right into it!

One of the big stories that have emerged in the last couple of days has been the return of Shaq to the Celtics. The man looked pretty sharp and agile! He got a nice reception from the fans in Boston and the Celtics went to him and he delivered. This is why they made the Perkins trade. Because Shaq is here.  Because Shaq can deliver. Because Shaq…oh crap he’s injured already.

The man who’s been out since Feb 1st couldn’t even last five minutes before he suffered a calf strain ending his night prematurely. They should call him “The Big Patient” or “The Big Injury” now. I wonder if Shaq needs an extra large wheelchair?

Anyways, this is huge news to the Celtics as they were planning on playing Shaq in their final six games to get him ready for the playoffs. That’s not going to happen now. Nenad Kristic is also injured but he’s practicing again so he should be alright. They need Shaq though. Thankfully they’ve still got Kendrick Perkins to shore up the…oh no wait, Danny Ainge traded him…awkward…

The Knicks finally secured their first Playoff berth in 7 years and they’re on a nice little 3 game win streak. I hope they match up with the Celtics (which could happen). That would mean at least 4 shots per game of Spike Lee and Ray Allen’s mum on TV! Spike must love that the Knicks are moderately successful now. Imagine if Ray Allen has a huge game at MSG and does the “Reggie Choke” sign at Spike!

Small side note 1- does anyone else think its weird how much they show Ray Allen’s mum during games? The man’s 35! He’s been in the league 15 years! Maybe her and Spike should team up and do a documentary and call it “Ray’s Mom Doing Work” where they film her making sandwiches, ironing and cleaning…I’m just kidding! But imagine a documentary on Ray’s mum, with 7 different cameras on her while she’s watching a Celtic game, with her and Spike voicing it over, talking about what she’s thinking and feeling at the time. Tell me that’s not exciting!

Small side note 2-My other theory with the Perkins trade is that Kendrick slept with Ray Allen’s mum. That’s why he was traded. Delonte West was a bad influence on him…

It’s kind of crazy how under the radar the Miami Heat is now! They’re currently 2nd in the East only half a game up on the Celtics. Anyone else want them to implode in the playoffs? And what’s the deal with Haslem?  I’m surprised they haven’t put his face on a milk carton or checked the lost and found for him. Well actually, they’ve doing that to find Mike Miller’s jumpshot. And yes, it’s still missing.

Atlanta swept the season series against Orlando, and as I’ve said before, I’m surprised how badly Dwight can’t dominate Jason Collins! No one’s happier about that than Al Horford. He should buy Collins a car or something NBA players can afford…like a private island. I don’t think the Hawks would sweep the Magic in the Playoffs, but the match ups are looking to favour Atlanta. Especially if Stan van Gundy plays Bass which means Josh Smith doesn’t have to defend all the way out to the 3 point line.

Philly is a game and a half up on the Knicks in the second seed. Doug Collins has them playing some great basketball, going 23-12 since standing at 17-25 on Jan 30th. I’m most impressed with how Andre Iguodala has changed his game to benefit the team. By the way, he should’ve won that dunk contest against Nate Robinson in 2006. No contest. I mean Allen Iverson threw a pass to him! He should’ve won just for that! They’ve got a pretty young and athletic squad and the re-emergence of Elton Brand has been a nice addition for them. I think Brand has re-emerged now that Baron Davis isn’t trying to kill him anymore after he told Davis he’d resign with the Clippers, only to bail to the 76ers.

The Pacers are now 2 games up in the battle for the 8th spot. Roy Hibbert and Josh McRoberts are quite a long and athletic frontline and Danny Granger is a solid player. I’m still iffy with their SG position, although if they match up with the Bulls in Round 1, it probably wouldn’t be so bad, as the Bulls don’t have anyone good in the SG rotation either. However, the Bulls have Derrick Rose. Did you know that Mike Dunleavy is the second highest paid player on the Pacers? Talk about Larry Bird helping a fellow white guy out!

And speaking of the Bulls, they’re first in the East and appear to have that locked up. They do face some tough games before the playoffs against fellow playoff teams including Boston, New York and the Magic. Derrick Rose is still the leading candidate for MVP (although there have been some solid and legitimate arguments for Dwight, LeBron and Kobe). The media have basically anointed him the MVP and to be honest, he’s been pretty deserving.

Another little side note, in my first article I said that Tim Duncan and Greg Popovich were the last player-coach combination to win the award. Well actually I was wrong (Holy plot twist Batman). I know it’s shocking and you’ll probably never trust me again, but actually there have been two different occasions since Duncan and Popovich that a player and a coach from the same team have both won. Duncan and Popovich were the last combination to win both AND THE NBA TITLE IN THAT SEASON. Steve Nash and Mike D’Antoni both won in 2004-2005, and LeBron James and Mike Brown both won it last year. LAST YEAR! Shame on me. A blind folded Stevie Wonder would’ve seen that! My bad people.

Outside of the playoff race there’s not a whole lot to tell. Washington won back to back road games for the first time since 2009! The Wizards had played 70 consecutive road games without winning two in a row.  How crazy is that!? Just think, the last time the Wizards won two games in a row, Charlie Sheen was working for Trolls, Tiger Woods was happily married, Michael Jackson was preparing for his “This Is It” concerts (too soon?), Avatar and The Hangover were being released, Barack Obama became President and Lady Gaga was wearing sunglasses big enough to have people guessing if she was attractive… sadly, she is not.

Well I think I’m going to have to do the Western Conference run down on a separate article. Make sure you check back tomorrow. I can see you’re excited already. Either that or you’re wondering how a Chinese guy can write so many English words in one go…

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  1. Flo Allen
    April 8, 2011 at 9:18 am

    I resent your comments, what Kendry and I have is very special and not to mention very private.. If it wasn’t for media scum like you, we’d still have our double date Fridays with Gloria and Delonte!

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